


Too Soon

by celticheart72



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Established Relationship, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-25
Updated: 2020-05-25
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:35:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24375145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/celticheart72/pseuds/celticheart72
Summary: Bucky is always cancelling plans with you to help Steve when he calls and you’ve had enough.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Reader
Comments: 6
Kudos: 92





	Too Soon

**Author's Note:**

> For a request from Tumblr where reader and Bucky have been together for a while, and the reader has been getting fed up with Bucky choosing Steve over them.

_ I’m sorry, doll, but Steve needs my help … _

Sighing, you disconnect your cell phone before his message finishes playing. It’s been the same thing for the last several months. Every time Steve says a word Bucky is always there. 

Until the end of the line.

And you understand. You really do. Steve carries around so much guilt for what happened to Bucky since his fall. Of course, Bucky also feels a sense of responsibility for everything Steve did to get Bucky back. 

No one is to blame for what happened except for Hydra.

Steve is Bucky’s oldest friend. His only real family. They are brothers in every sense of the word but blood.

You know he isn’t deliberately neglecting you. Bucky is truly the most attentive boyfriend you’ve ever had. As long as he’s present.

At some point though you need to come first and you’re no longer sure Bucky can do that. Maybe you pushed too hard for something he wasn’t ready for. He came back from Wakanda without the Hydra programming but that didn’t mean the trauma he’d lived through had been erased. Bucky had been the Winter Soldier longer than he had been himself. He had guilt and pain and debt that he would probably live with for the rest of his life.

The two of you got together almost immediately after he left Wakanda. 

Your eyes drift down to your cell phone where a picture of him smiles back at you from your lock screen.

Had it been too soon?

Maybe it’s time you both have some time apart. Before you start to resent him and he loses sight of why he’s with you in the first place. 

Later that evening when Bucky walks through the apartment door you’re sitting at the kitchen island waiting for him.

“Hey doll, I’m sorry I had to cancel our plans tonight,” his smile looks so sincerely apologetic you almost can’t go through with what you know needs to happen. The smile fades when he gets close enough to see that your nose and eyes are red from crying. “What’s wrong?”

“Bucky, I don’t want to be mad at you for what you just said, but damnit … “ You take in a shuddering breath and shake your head, “ ... how many times do you think I can keep hearing that?”

He’s completely silent and just blinks at you.

“Now isn’t the time for you to shut down on me. I need you to understand how I feel.”

The kitchen light glints off his left hand as he flexes his fingers. “Steve needs me too, doll.”

“I don’t have an issue with that,” your voice raises just a tiny bit with your emotions and you drop it immediately. You both always promised you’d talk like adults who respected each other. “Does he even know how often you cancel plans with me when he calls?”

Bucky shakes his head, “No. He’d tell me not to if he did.”

For some reason that just makes your heart jump right up into your throat. Before you say anything you might regret though, you swallow back the retort that sours your tongue.

“Don’t you think that should tell you something, Bucky?”

He scrubs his hand over his face and moves around the island to lean against the counter facing you.

“What do you want me to do? I owe Steve my life. If it weren’t for him goin’ on the run like he did to find me and get my head on straight? Get the trigger words out? I wouldn’t be standin’ here right now,” he doesn’t raise his voice but you can’t miss the anguish in his tone.

“He fought for you.”

“Yeah, he did.”

You stare at each other for a long moment while you wait and hope that the significance of your words sink in. 

But his expression is impassive and you just don’t have the courage to ask him to fight for you. Instead you nod as you get down from your stool and grab your purse and keys then move around to where he stands. Thankfully you hadn't taken the step of moving in together so you still had your own apartment. 

“I’m going home,” you sigh, feeling defeated. “When you have time for me, call.”

“Doll, I’m here now.” 

You give him a wan smile as you push up on your toes to kiss his cheek.

“I’m tired.” What you leave unsaid is that you don’t want to play second fiddle to his best friend. “Goodnight Bucky.”

When you’re standing in the hallway you have a fleeting thought that you hope this isn’t  _ Goodbye _ .

**Author's Note:**

> If you like my work kudos are appreciated. If you love it comments are wonderful. If you have constructive criticism or questions let's talk. If you leave blatantly rude or negative comments, know that no hate is allowed here and will be deleted. And if you read my work and are too shy to interact right now, know that's okay too.


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